A Million Christmas Moments

The clock is ticking down the remaining minutes of our Christmas Day here in Fukushima. A gentle snow has been falling off and on since yesterday, and we now have our first real blanket of white outside, the colored lights on in the apartment, and--of course!--the Christmas music playing.

Cindy and I have joked that because of our Advent Bible study that started weeks ago, we feel as though Christmas should be long past. Even though our joking sometimes reveals a desire to get back to the "normal routine," our long Christmas has really been a blessing. Truly, it seems like we have had millions of Christmas moments--many that have happened when we least expected them. I've already blogged about some of the Bible study moments, but here are just a few more experiences of Christmas blessing:

- Our children in Koriyama love lighting the candles for worship. They do the job of "acolyte" with deep sincerity and a heavy sense of responsibility. During the Christmas Eve candlelight service this week, the children took turns lighting all of the candles, and seeing their faces display awe and delight at the light reminded me of the awesome, joyful news of Christ's coming as the Light for our darkness.

- Last night's Christmas Eve service in Fukushima brought together English students, Bible study students, church members, family members, and others... Afterwards everyone shared sweets and tea and talked...there was real conversation and prayer between some, first-time meetings for others, and even my high-school student stayed and talked until almost everyone had left.

Looking around the church at our tiny "Charlie Brown" Christmas tree and knowing the "real" stories behind the Christmas Eve clothing--the "real" frustrations behind the looks of general goodwill--somehow made the evening very special. The Baby in the manger was real--He came to step into our real darkness. Tense relationships, old and new fears, musical ponderings and wanderings, my utter lack of timing when trying to work our lagging light switches...from the funny to the frightening to the things that keep us in shame...Jesus came to work forgiveness and freedom in all of it, in the real.

- Cindy and I made our way to a community building in the afternoon today, because we'd learned last night that a girl who came to the Christmas Eve service was having a short flute concert. The girl had been studying in France and only recently moved back to Japan. As soon as Cindy and I entered the building for the concert, we were greeted not only by the flutist, but also by another lady we met earlier from Rwanda and a girl from Hong Kong. The afternoon music was made extra special by the randomness of the community gathered--who knew that America, Hong Kong, Europe, and Africa would all be represented in a small Christmas gathering in Fukushima? We basked in the lights and the music, and I couldn't help but think, "How like God, who takes people out of every race, culture, tribe, and nation and joins them as family..."

Christmas. I know that this is only repeating what many have already said...but it's so much more than a day, or a season, or a specific tradition, or weather, or music. It's God's huge plan of salvation. Life, light, joy, peace, relationship...it's all there, included as God's blessing, as His redemption of our brokenness and His abundance in exchange for our lack. It's more than a million moments. It's part of my every breath of life, my motivation for living, my peace in chaos and my confidence in the midst of shame or incompetence.

Yay.

That's all. Be blessed, dear ones, with your Christmas moments.

It's all part of the job? And an early New Year's goal...

Tonight marked an auspicious date in my life. No, not Christmas Eve, although tonight was the first of two...

Tonight, I was officially the church organist. Officially--as in, I got my music Tuesday, practiced Wednesday and today, and played tonight. I didn't even allow myself to play off the guitar chords, and instead I worked out fingerings for scales of notes that I used to know how to play correctly long ago and somehow forgot when I picked up guitar and contemporary music...

The whole thing brings back memories...mostly of my mother, who used to drink pepto-bismal when she was requested to play the organ at church.

Am I just another generation, preparing to do the same thing? Tonight's job was just several carols on an old pump organ that has keys splitting from years of Japan's humidity and frigidity--hardly a high-quality instrument, and definitely not a musical performance to brag about. But what about next year, which is right around the corner? There's already been talk of a worship committee, a music-planning group, a rotation of organ players that includes my name...

I'm not an organist. Not only am I not an organist, but the people here are not music majors who enjoy singing high "E's" and who can keep track of how many beats are in a measure. Why must I practice an instrument that I can't play to worship God in this fellowship of believers? (Note: I didn't say, 'Why is the organ used in worship?' I like an organ--when it's played by someone who enjoys playing it--someone who can worship with it...).

I'm stopping, I'm stopping...sigh. I know that I harp on this all the time, but the experience behind the questions glares me in the face every single Sunday. And every time I sit down to play an organ.

Cindy adds that it not only glares me in the face, but it stings our ears.

The end. I promise I'll be more Christmas-y tomorrow. :)

*******Days later :)********

Okay, so I'm going to add an amendment now and say that I've been thinking of the blog (above) on and off ever since writing it. Why do I get so frustrated over these questions? The answer that seems to ring true at the moment is that I wonder about what I'm communicating when I play the organ, what we communicate as a church in worship, what believers and those who don't believe yet hear or think or feel during the worship time.

Anyway, I was convicted that I should stop complaining about my questions and do something productive with them--like seek for answers. Over the last year or so, I've thought about studying communication more in-depth. Some of my motivation for this stems from trying to navigate Japanese culture and American culture, and some stems from trying to navigate church culture, religion, theology, and faith.

Maybe this is a New Year's goal coming a little early. :) However, I really do want to learn more about communication--so that instead of pounding out blogs with a growling undertone, I can pinpoint concrete problems and offer concrete solutions to gaps in communication that I feel around me but as of yet don't quite know how to express.

Advent reflections and photos

Rain drumming on the rooftop sets the mood for this "first-morning-of-Christmas-break," and it seems like the perfect time to hole up in a pile of blankets and type. :) December always seems a little like a freight train heading downhill, picking up speed until it reaches a scary pace, and I sometimes wonder, as one of the riders, what will become of us in the plunge! Classes officially finished for the year yesterday, and the next few days simply hold preparations in the food, music, and game variety for the remaining Christmas Eve worship times and Christmas parties.

Christmas.

I've felt like a broken-record all Advent, telling my students again and again, "Jesus was not just a normal baby born in a stable! Christmas is bigger than a one-day celebration and the strangest birth the world's ever heard; Christmas has much more to offer than that."

And so we've been able to explore the depths and the heights, realizing again and again that this Baby is King of Kings and Lord of Lords, the Son of David, and the promised Messiah who reveals to us God as rightful Ruler and Prince of peace.

We've been able to ask real questions about faith and life and rest in the light and guidance of the Baby who is the Bright Morning Star.

We've been able to both cringe and rejoice at the sacrifice of the Lamb--the Baby born to die for sin and somehow wash us white in His blood.

We've been able to jump for joy with small children, realizing that this Baby offers to all who believe the right to be children of God.

We've been able to see promises fulfilled with Abraham, sing "Glory!" with the angels, and receive again and again the offer of life from the Word who was in the beginning and the King who, in the end, invites those who are thirsty to come drink from the water of life.

There is something about typing it all out again, putting it down in black-and-white, that brings a measure of awe into my heart. This is what we learned, what we talked about--what I had a chance to be a part of every week, every event, every day, every class. I pray that my students remember these discussions and Bible studies and receive the same gift of awe and wondrous joy.

And I pray, for myself and all of you readers experiencing a little motion sickness on the December freight train, that either in the midst of breath-taking speed or during the short lulls of rest and refueling, we might be filled with joy and awe at our Savior's birth--the Savior who was fully Baby and so much more!

Finally, some pictures from the last few weeks:

The Koriyama Christmas tree, decorated by several overly-excited children. :)

Advent calendar adventures--thanks to Pr. Becker!

First snowfall in Fukushima

After-school program's Christmas party

Things I'd like to remember from today...

- A "breakthrough" conversation regarding work, rest, and expectations between Cindy and I...followed with at least an hour of Andrew Peterson songs and just...rest.

- One of the mothers from Bible study tonight asking to take home a Japanese Bible, because she wants to read it from beginning to end.

- Thirty minutes of Christmas tree decorating with kids who hadn't done it before. Even the 1-year-old couldn't quite get enough of it. I'm not sure they got the concept of filling in open places...there will be a picture of several very-decorated branches posted at some point!

- Three families who were previously strangers sharing rides, homes, new things, worries, and joys with each other.

- Dinner with Sensei, and conversation that has been needed for awhile...

- The 2-year-old boy from one family kissing the 1-year-old girl from the other family in the glow of the Christmas tree lights and the general atmosphere of joy and goodwill. No kidding. :)

- Amazement in my heart and on the faces of the others when we learned again that the first people the angels called to see Jesus' birth were shepherds. Joy in recognizing that we are all welcome at the "stable" of the King's birth--with our smelly clothing, imperfect hearts, lonely fears, and all the shame we've ever encountered...we are still invited to come and rejoice at the love we find!

Linguistic Woes--international worship is not for the faint of heart!

With Christmas quickly approaching, I decided to put together some pages of Christmas music in English and Japanese to use with students and for evening worship and prayer times. It turned into an interesting saga, so I've decided to document my woes here...

Take "O Come, O Come Emmanuel" for instance. If I wanted to include lyrics for the average Japanese adult, this is what I would type up:

久しく待ちにし　主よ、とく来たりて

Which is all well and good. Except that I (and any child) can't sing aloud all of the kanji (Chinese characters) in the line, because each kanji has multiple readings. I could memorize the readings for the line above, but there are a lot of lines in "O Come, O Come Emmanuel," making memorization a rather impractical option.

So I have to add this line also:

ひさしくまちにし　しゅよ、とくきたりて

久しく待ちにし　主よ、とく来たりて

Okay, now we're all on the same page, you might think. But no--if I'm going to use this song with English students, I need to include the English:

O Come, O come Emmanuel

ひさしくまちにし　しゅよ、とくきたりて

久しく待ちにし　主よ、とく来たりて

Very good, one might think. But wait--now I also need guitar chords.

Em------------Am------Em

O Come, O come Emmanuel

ひさしくまちにし　しゅよ、とくきたりて

久しく待ちにし　主よ、とく来たりて

Surely now, this is all I need, right? Well...if any other foreigner was going to come and join us in singing, I would probably also have to add roman characters so they know how to pronounce the Japanese characters. So, here goes one more line:

Em------------Am------Em

O Come, O come Emmanuel

ひさしくまちにし　しゅよ、とくきたりて

Hisashiku machi nishi Shu yo, toku kitarite

久しく待ちにし　主よ、とく来たりて

I now have five lines. Count them. FIVE. Do you know how many lines are in ONE verse of "O Come, O Come Emmanuel"? And do you know how many VERSES are in "O Come, O Come Emmanuel"? (Quick return to elementary school mathematics: 5x4x7+the chorus, which would be 10 lines...) Answer...is that really 150 lines?!?!

And the clincher:

We sang "O Come, O Come Emmanuel" in a morning prayer meeting this last week. The Japanese lady with us, who has been a Christian for a long time, commented afterwards, "I wonder what 'とく来たりて(tokukitarite)' really means."

Good grief. Why am I trying to put together lyrics for songs that are not understandable anyways? And remind me again why we insist on translating hymns?

Last night I finally just told Cindy, "There will be no more singing. None. I'm done. So there." She laughed at me.

Thankfully, we have Taize music. Most of those songs are only one line, which means each song only requires five lines. And Sensei to explain the meaning behind them. Oy.